3 Lazy Ways to Rewire Your Brain for Happiness, Success and Manifesting Your Dream Life

*DISCLAIMER* This blog is just a small snippet of the free eBook that I have created. If you want to get your free copy and find out the other 27 lazy ways to design the life that you want, you can find it here

If you look online for ways to become happier, more positive and more successful, you will find different versions of the same list.

All giving you a list of even more things to do in your day. Yes, they are helpful and, yes, they will help you become happier, more positive and more successful but come on, who has the time to meditate for 20 minutes and exercise for an hour before you even go to work in the morning?

Life is busy! Well, at least, mine is. Yes, I like to meditate and journal and even do some yoga now and again, but I don’t want to dedicate 3 hours and a whole lot of energy to activities that, to be honest, I really don’t have time for. I don’t really watch TV, I don’t scroll on social media, I don’t even have as much sleep as I’d like, so don’t try to tell me I could find those 3 hours if I tried.

I don’t want to over-work myself to feel happier. Sounds a bit counter-productive, right? I want things to just be effortless and do it for me. I mean isn’t that what technology is for? 

Who would choose to hand wash their clothes when the washing machine can do a much better job?

In Neuro-Linguisitic Programming (NLP – are you bored of me talking about it yet?) We create (and collapse) things called ‘anchors’ but they are also known as ‘triggers’ that are basically when an emotional response is created by a stimulus. For example, when you hear a certain song and it reminds you of school because it’s what you sang with your friend at a talent show. Or when you smell rolling tobacco and it reminds you of your grandad as he used to put it in his pipe when you were little. Or that angelic picture of your kids when they were little always gives you that heart-warming feeling of overwhelming love and pride. 

You have a very real emotional response to something that you’ve either remembered or has come through one of your five senses. That’s an anchor.

You can create your own anchors that constantly remind you of how awesome you are, how beautiful you are and how worthy you are. You can also set up your own anchors to help manifest your desires into your life. I’m just going to say it. I like feeling good. Feeling good feels good and I want to make sure everything (or as many things as possible) in my environment support my happiness.

Anchor #1

How many times a day do you enter a password into your phone or computer? If you’re like most people, the answer is probably “a lot”. Why not take advantage of that and make your password something that you want to remind yourself of? Instead of your password being something like the name of your pet from 15 years ago, why not make it something like ‘IamHappy’, ‘IamLoved’, ‘1amEnough’, or ‘Feeling5exy’? Or you can create a password that represents what you want to manifest into your life, for example ‘Buisne55Owner’ or ‘sexySize14’. Even the pin numbers on your phone or debit cards can represent something. Everytime you type ‘0-8-0-8’ you can make each number match the syllables to “I.Am.So.Great”. 

Everytime you consciously enter in your password or pin number, you will unconsciously send a reminder to your subconscious and tell it “this is how it’s going to be around here from now on” and over time, you will develop these things as beliefs about your identity. 
The Reticular Activating System (RAS) in your brain will then go on to look for evidence related to your anchor to reinforce it’s value and strengthen it’s believability. So when you keep putting in your password ‘1feelpretty’ and your pin number is 0-0-3-3 (Oh.So.Pret-ty), the next time someone pays you the compliment “You look really great today”, you’re going to start believe it rather than think they’re obviously delusional or they’re just being polite. You will even pass a mirror and think “Oh hey, beautiful!

Anchor #2

It is believed that the average human receives around 11 million pieces of information per second through our five senses, but this would be too much for our conscious mind to handle. So, our Reticular Activating System (RAS) filters this information and only delivers the pieces which it believes to be relevant to our conscious mind. So, rather than 11 million pieces of information, we are only consciously aware of about 50 pieces of information. That means that our brain is receiving approximately 10,999,950 pieces of information per second that we are unaware of

It makes sense. If you’re watching TV or working at your computer, you tend to have a tunnel vision and are only aware of that which you are focused on. You don’t notice the colour of the walls or the feel of the desk. You don’t notice the sound of the birds tweeting outside or how fast you’re breathing. You don’t notice the feel of the clothes on your skin or that you’re shaking your foot and driving someone else crazy. There is information flooding into your five senses every second without you realising it. Let’s take advantage of this

By posting your favourite quotes or mantras on a sticky note or a print-out on your desk, near your TV or somewhere (safely) in your car, you are allowing your peripheral vision to pick up on this achor and plant yet another seed into your subconscious mind. 

Even when you are unaware, you’re conditioning your subconscious mind to work for you.

Anchor #3

This is a bit science-y, so I’m going to try and keep it simple. 

Dr Bruce Lipton said that there are only two ways to reprogram your subconscious mind. The first is through repetition. By repeating thoughts and behaviours, we train our subconscious mind to run these automatically. As the subconscious mind is habitual programming, it only knows what we teach it. So the more we consciously run these thoughts and behaviours, the more we will unconsciously run them.

The second way, is to plant the desired programming when you have direct access to the subconscious mind, which only happens when the brain is in the theta state. The theta state, in adults, can be accessed just before falling asleep and just before awakening. 

By listening to a hypnosis audio or subliminal music (Music with subliminal messages that can only be heard by the subconscious mind and cannot be heard consciously) when you are drifting off to sleep, you will pour in the programming during the entire time the brain is in the theta wave state. 

This is the ultimate lazy way to reprogram your subconscious mind. This is MY way.

This is probably one of the most powerful things you can do to manifest happiness, success or your desires into your reality.

You can find hundreds, if not thousands of subliminal and hypnosis audios on YouTube, or, you can create your own. 

Write a quick script (so you don’t freeze on what to say) of things you want to be true for yourself (list all the things you can think of), on things you want to manifest into your life and emotions you want to feel. Remember to keep the statements in the positive (eg “I am happy” instead of “I don’t want to be sad”). Then grab your smartphone and record yourself saying these statements in a slow, quiet, relaxing and soft voice – remember you want to be able to go to sleep. You can even play relaxing music in the background to sooth you and help you unwind. I’d suggest making the audio around 30 minutes long (or longer if you can). You can repeat your list over and over for the whole 30 minutes but remember not to rush it, take your time and put some belief into those statements. 

Then, each night, pop some earphones into your phone and play the audio you have created while drifting off to sleep. No one has to know what you’re listening to or the statements that you’ve recorded. You’ve done your bit, now let your pre-recorded words do the hard work.

Think of something you’d like to be, do or have in your life right now and brainstorm all the ways you can apply these three anchors to help condition your subconscious mind to work for you.
To read more and get your free copy, click here.

Keep Safe

We are currently experiencing something that we’ve never been faced with before in this lifetime. At least not to this scale. I’m not usually one to feed the fear, and I’m still not going to do that now, but I would like to offer my thoughts on how to keep safe as well as sane during this time.

In the UK, we have been told to practice social distancing and although I think this is good advice, it can be very detrimental to our mood and our mental health.

We have not yet been put on lock down and still have some freedom. So use this time to take a walk in a park or in the woods or areas that do not have a lot of people. Get our in nature as much as you can, even if it’s just in your garden or on your balcony. Open the windows and let some fresh air in as much as possible.

If we are eventually put on lock down, use that time to give your home a good spring clean, declutter your wardrobe, any papers or rubbish you have lying around. Give yourself a good facial, get some paints out and get creative, try out some new recipes and get baking with your kids. You could use the time to sort out some finances that you’ve been meaning to get round to or start reading that book you’ve wanted to read for weeks.

Of course you could just binge watch the latest box set, but you could also get the board games out, converse with your loved ones, give everyone a chore to get involved, create a home-made obstacle course or work out how you can make a meal out of any food that needs to be used up.

Let’s use this time to connect back with one another. I’m not just talking about the people we live with either. Let’s Skype or Facetime with loved ones, especially those that may be self-isolating alone and feeling extra lonely during this time. Catch up with friends and family across the globe and see how they all are. Call your elderly relatives or Email your favourite cousin.

Now is also the perfect time to eat really well. Eat lots of fruits and veggies to give your immune system the best possible chance to fight off anything that may come your way and watch YouTube videos for workouts or yoga practices. Make this fun and do it as a family or as a group. Even if you are all completely rubbish, and just spend most of the time laughing at how bad you all are, it will lift your spirits. Have you ever heard that laughter is the best medicine?

My wish is that you’re all keeping safe and also reach out to someone if you need something. Now is the time where we should all pul together and help each other the best we can. If you are going food shopping and you know one of your neighbors is elderly and vulnerable, offer to do a bit of shopping for them. If someone you know lives alone, give them a call.

Lastly, I’d just like to say, let’s all give so much gratitude and respect for all the NHS staff who are pushed to their limits at the best of times, but right now they are keeping our country going. They don’t have the luxury of self-isolating as a precaution. We are so incredibly lucky in the UK to have free healthcare and know that if we were to get sick, we would be cared for regardless of our financial situation.

Thank you to all the NHS staff who are working so very hard to ensure that our sick and injured are being cared for!

Brain storm, right now, any possibilities you can think of that you could do at home.
Imagine you were given a few weeks off of work to sort your home and yourself out, what would you do with that time?
Where would you want to focus your time and energy?

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

Speaking from experience, I know how true this statement is. Actually, sometimes you feel like you’re going one step forward and two steps back.

It can feel really discouraging and frustrating, especially when you feel like you’re just starting to build some momentum and get somewhere, you regress and are suddenly a few steps behind where you’ve worked so hard to get to.

I wish there was some way I could sugarcoat this. I wish I had a secret formula to just go forward without having to go back a few steps now and again.

But there’s not. Or at least not one that I know of.

I’m not telling you this to become morbid or tell you to give up hope. I’m not telling you that there’s not point in trying. In fact, I actually want to tell you the opposite.

I want you to look at your life as a journey. No matter what or where you’re current destination is, I want you to approach this next part of your journey knowing that you will go two steps forward and one step back.

Let me explain why.

For the sake of ease of explanation, let’s say you’re currently starting from square one. Maybe you know that your goal in life is to get to square 10 or perhaps you just know it’s a certain number of steps in front of where you currently are. If could be five steps, or it could be 50.

Let’s say you decide to take this journey knowing full well that there will be times when you succeed and make progress (two steps forward) and there will also be times that you will make mistakes, learn lessons and course-correct, AKA ‘fail‘ (one step back).

One month from now, you make a bit of progress and take two steps forward. You’re now standing on square three.
One month on from that, for whatever reason, you take one step back and you’re now standing on square two.
Another month passes by and you make some more progress and take two steps forward onto square four.
Again, after some time, you find yourself back a step onto square three.
Then again, you find yourself creating a little momentum and suddenly you’re at square five.

It wasn’t really too long ago that you started on square one, and now you’ve made some real progress from where you once stood and you’ve made some mistakes and learned some valuable lessons along the way for the future too.

Now imagine if you’d never have tried. you would still be standing on square one and moaning about it. You can understand, then, why they say:

The only time you ‘fail‘ is when you don’t even try.

I’m learning to embrace my set backs and look at them as way I can either improve upon or learn from even more.

If you’re loving life one day on cloud 9, I mean square 9, and the next day you find yourself on square four, don’t sweat it. Don’t beat yourself up. It’s not an opportunity to discount everything you’ve worked so hard to achieve and it’s not the time to reject yourself. It’s a a chance to redirect yourself. The good news is that you already know how to get to square 9, because you’ve done it before. This might just be an opportunity to find a more sustainable way there.

You’ve overcome and managed to get through every single one of your bad days. You’re a pretty big deal! Stop trying to be perfect and acknowledge right now that life isn’t linear. We all have to take two steps forward and one step back.

What have you been putting off in your life because you’ve been too afraid to even start?
Is it to learn a new skill or habit?
Is it to confront some difficult emotions?
Is it to have the courage to admit what you want in life?
Whatever your heart is calling for, write it down now and brainstorm some ways that you can make it happen.

Then, I want you to brainstorm some possible back steps and for each back step, look at ways to either prevent it happening or a solution to bounce-back from it.

Being Too busy

Life’s busy, right? There are so many things we’d like to do, have and achieve, but finding the time to make them happen feels almost impossible.

We work ourselves to the bone, then we come home and have children to tend to, a home to maintain, food to prepare and somehow how find a way to regain our sanity too.

We are so busy that our minds are constantly running just to process the bare minimum. We forget birthdays, miss appointments, lose touch with friends and even family.

There doesn’t seem to be enough time to fit everything in and even when we ask for help, signs or guidance, we never seem to get it. We want new business ideas, clarity on our next steps in life or even just an insight to what to have for dinner, but our minds are so cluttered with every other decision we have to make and all the other 1001 things that we have on our to-do list that we can’t find the mental capacity to begin to comprehend it all.

I’m going to tell you how you can receive the clarity and intuitive guidance, but you might think I’m crazy and it goes against our logical mind.

In order to be more productive and receive the guidance and ideas that you’ve asked for, all you need to do is… stop.

I’m serious.

Make down-time a priority.

When you’re constantly busy and always on the go, you are running in reaction mode. You are just treading water and struggle to keep your head afloat. Your body and brain is in survival mode. There is so much focus on all that needs to be done right now, that the future doesn’t even exist.

What you really want is to planning and aiming for where you want to go, while enjoying the present. You want to be operating in action mode.

Read my blog, How to Reduce Overwhelm, for effective ways to handle your to-do list. This is a great start to freeing up your time.

Some of the top entrepreneurs of our time, Richard Brandon being one of them, say their best ideas came to them while on vacation.

This is because we’re not occupying our mind with all the daily tasks we have to do. We allow our mind a break and some time to wonder and explore possibilities. We allow ourselves the time to reflect on what we want and don’t want. What we like and don’t like. What we want more and less of in life. When you’re constantly busy all the time, you’re not pondering these questions.

I know, I know. We don’t have a private island to relax in a hammock for two weeks. But that’s not necessary. Even just taking the time to go for a walk and enjoying the view or cooking a delicious meal and allowing yourself the luxury of being present while you enjoy it instead of shoving something down your throat quickly so you can get back to work. Taking the time to enjoy a book or meeting up with a friend who lights you up. And, of course, the most powerful one, meditating.

By having a good system for your day-to-day actions, being present in the now but looking towards the future and allowing yourself, your body and your mind some well deserved time off, you will be amazed at the results.

Plan and organize your work load by following the steps here.
Think of an activity that you’d like to do in order for you to clear your mind and enjoy some down-time.
Schedule that into your diary now and make it a priority.

Your Tribe Affects Your Vibe

You may or may not have heard this before. You may or may not agree. And although I don’t believe you should give people the power to determine your happiness, I do agree that the things and people around you can have a major influence on your overall vibe.

When someone around us is sad, it has an impact on us. Likewise, when someone around us is happy, it also has an impact on us. Have you ever been speaking to someone who is laughing so much while trying to recall a funny story, but they can’t get the words out and you find yourself laughing too even though you are yet to hear the funny story? Their joy and laughter has radiated from them and altered your state to match their joy and laughter without even knowing the source of the cause.

It is believed that you are the average of the 5 people you most spend your time with, in happiness, in love, in finances, in perspective and more. If this is the case, then look at your 5 closest people now. Do you like what you see? Are you surrounded by people who are positive, always laughing, planning fun things to do and earn a great wage? Or, do you see people who are stuck in a negative cycle, always complaining, always make excuses to why they can’t do fun things and never have enough money?

I’m not suggesting you should blame or shame the people who are not living up to the ideal state you wish them to be in. Everyone is on their own journey and perhaps they don’t know they’re in a negative state or that they have the power to change it.

This is about you. This is about your journey.

In fact, by up-leveling yourself and saying yes to a happier, fuller life that’s more in-line with who you were born to be, you actually do them a huge favour by allowing them to follow in the footsteps that you’ve taken or at least believe that they deserve happiness too.

Get clear about the version of yourself you want to be. Get clear on what you want from life. Get clear on the conversations you want to have and start having those conversations, either with your existing friends or make new ones (or do both!)

There is no limit to what you can be, do or have in life and anything you want, there are people on this planet who either want to same or already have the same and know how to help you get it too.

We are blessed to live in an age where we can communicate with people across this enormous globe in an instant. We can see and speak to someone on the other side of the world in real time through technology, electricity and the almighty internet. Don’t place limitations on what is available to you.

If you could not fail, how would you like to design your life?
What conversations would you have?
What plans would you make with your friends?
What would you do with your spare time?

What can you do to implement some aspects of this life into your current situation?

What are you Asking For?

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve sat down with a client and asked them what they want and they’ve listed off all the things they don’t want.

But we’ve all done it, right? I know I have. You know what isn’t working for you in life so you’re like ‘Yeah, that. I don’t want that.’

Some of these might sound familiar…
I don’t want to be poor
I don’t want to be fat
I don’t want to feel tired all the time
I don’t want to be treated this way
I don’t want to feel stressed
I don’t want to work all the time
I don’t want to be in pain
I don’t want to cry all the time

The problem is, our subconscious mind works in pictures and doesn’t understand negative statements. So, if I tell you “Under no circumstances are you to think of a bright pink elephant” you can’t help but create an image of a pink elephant. Your subconscious mind doesn’t even acknowledge that I asked you not to do it.

So when you keep repeating your mantra of ‘I just don’t want to stressed anymore“, your mind just keeps creating images that represent you being stressed, even if you don’t realize it. The images then trigger an emotional response (which usually makes you feel like crap).

The faster and more frequent these images come up, the more they ingrain into your subconscious as a belief (you can read more about beliefs here).

Then, the Reticular Activating System (RAS) part of your brain works as a filtration system. Humans typically receive around 50 million pieces of information per second through our five senses but our RAS filters out most of it and only delivers to our conscious mind that which it believes is relevant to us, which is around 50 pieces.

How is this relevant?

Well, our RAS finds all the information or ‘evidence‘ it can to back up our belief systems, and anything that contradicts our beliefs will be completely filtered out and won’t even show up on your radar. So, if you keep focusing on your poverty, it will become your belief and even when you receive prosperity in your life, it will go over your head altogether because it doesn’t support your belief of poverty.

The misconception is that we assume that if we say we don’t want something, then we are obviously asking for the opposite.

This is wrong.

By saying you don’t want to be sad, you are not asking for happiness.
By saying you don’t want to feel tired, you are not asking to feel energized.
By saying you don’t want to be treated badly, you are not specifying how you do want to be treated.

Get practiced on asking for exactly what you do want instead of what you don’t want.

Stop saying “no” to what you don’t want and start saying “yes” to what you do want.

What have you been calling into your life by saying what you don’t want?
Can you think of a new statements that states what you do want?
Write down that statement now and then list 10 – 15 things you can think of to back up this new statement.

Follow the Nudges

Have you ever noticed the clues and signs we receive along this road we call life? The synchronicities and the coincidences? The little nudges we receive to point us into the right direction?

Have you ever had that “gut” feeling that you couldn’t explain but trusted fully? Have you ever followed your heart? Have you ever known something without anyone else first telling you?

The nudges are all around us and we have become oblivious to them even though we follow them religiously.

When you feel hungry, you know it’s time to eat. That’s a nudge saying that your fuel tank is running low and it’s time to top up… and you obey.

When you see a car speeding towards you, you know it’s time to get out of the way. That’s a nudge telling you danger is very close and you need to move… and you obey.

When you hear the doorbell ring, you know to open the door. That nudge is telling you you have a visitor… but it’s up to you if you obey or pretend you’re not home... Or is that just me?

My point is that there are nudges all around us. You can label them whatever you want. God, the Universe, Source energy, Intuition, Nature or anything else. It’s not important.

There is a bigger picture, a higher power at work and just because we cannot comprehend or fully understand it all, doesn’t mean we can’t benefit from it.

What is important is that you listen to the calling.

This also includes your emotions. You’re emotions are there to tell you something important. Sometimes you need to deal with something lurking in the back of your mind before you can move on. Your emotions (especially repeat ones) are your nudges to face whatever it is that you need to face so that you can go through (and learn) whatever it is that you needed to in order to shed your old skin and grow.

There are signs and nudges everywhere, and if you chose to, you will see them too and can use them to guide you.

Sometimes our biggest problem is that we have too many options. First world problems, right?

How many times have you been asked “what do you want for dinner?” and you’ve racked your brain for an answer, but you can’t think of a meal you’d like to eat. Whereas if, instead, you was asked “What do you want for dinner, Pasta or salad?” It would be a lot easier to make up your mind.

If you follow the nudges, it takes the anxiety and stress out of making the “right” decision for fear of making the “wrong” one. Sometimes our brains can make a mountain out of a mole hill and dramatize something that really doesn’t need to be that complicated.

I receive nudges constantly. I receive signs and synchronicities that tell me I’m on the right path or perhaps I need to course-correct a little. It has helped me tremendously and I am getting quite good at learning to listen to my intuition more too.

If I see or hear something continuously and repeatedly, I might even google ‘spiritual meaning of a crow‘ or ‘ what does the number 4 symbolize?” The answer always blows me away as it’s always something I’m going through, dealing with or struggling with.

Life is rich with options and inspiration but if you’re feeling stuck, you might want to read this.

I invite you to be open to looking for the nudges that life is trying to give you. I invite you to be open to some love, guidance and a helping hand.